Institutionalized

"Sometimes I try to do things and it just doesn't work out the way I wanted to. I get real frustrated and I try hard to do it and I take my time and it doesn't work out the way I wanted to. It's like I concentrate real hard and it doesn't work out. Everything I do and everything I try never turns out. It's like I need time to figure these things out but there's always someone there going."

The calender hung itself

I wish I was more creative, more interessting and more fun to hang with. If there's a God, this God hasn't been that nice to me. I haven't got the face, the eyes, the body or the personality and I'm quite boring if you ask me. Except for some days, I can be quite interessting and funny sometimes but it depends of who I'm with and where I am.

Some people actually say I'm odd. I don't know if it's a good thing because sometimes you can hear people say the word in a positive way while other people say it in a negative way and I'm not very good in understanding irony even though I'm very ironic.

Confusing world, weird thoughts, odd (and ironic) girl. I loose myself in things like these and I can spend my days and nights daydreaming and trying to come up with good things to say and write but all I can come up with is weird thoughts, very weird thoughts by an odd (and ironic) girl.

I know exactly everything or maybe not

Hellu! Today is wednesday, 30th December 2009. Tomorrow is the last day of this year that has been pretty fucked up but awesome. I just have to say that even if 2009 seemed to be the worst year of my life I'm pretty happy and satisfied with things that happened this year. I met many interessting people and made new friends, got my heart broken a couple of times but it seems like it's fixed now, at least I'm hoping that it's fixed! I hope that 2010 is going to be even better.

Anyways... Today I'm going to town with Dannie and Julia. Dad gave me money so I can buy a gigantic teacup (<3) and mangotea, nomnom. I'm also planning to buy some cds and maybe some clothes.

Oh yeah, my computer is working now. Hooray! Now I gotta go and get dressed cause Dannie and Julia will be here at any time!

Let the right one come in

I'll let you come in

'

Christmas Holiday's plans

Saetia

Bed

Gingerbread

Soymilk

Blanket

Christmas movies

Henke

Brownies

Tea (LOTS of tea)

Just random thoughts

I love christmas, I love the smell of gingerbread and I like to sit at home watching Disney's Christmas Special and I really love spending time with my annoying but still wonderful parents. But there's one thing I really hate about Christmas... It's that stupid song "Hallelujah". You can hear it exactly everywhere and I mean, COME ON! There are other songs that you can sing during Christmas. Blargh!

Anyway, my throat hurts, my head aches and I wanna go home to my bed. I'd also like to have a cat. My friend Daniela has a cat. He's cute and yesterday when I was cuddling with him he jumped on my cellphone when I was reading a text message from my beloved my boyfriend.

Over and out, I don't really know what I'm doing right now, I'm too tired to put my thougths together and I think I'm a little bit hungry but I'm not sure, cause for 15 minutes ago I wasn't hungry but oh well, whatever. Wohoo, my christmas holiday starts today!

Oh well, goodbye

14:13

You know the fear of loosing something you just got? Well, I do. I also know how it feels every time my heart stops when you don't reply to my text messages or when you give me too short answers. Trust me, not the greatest feeling on this planet.

Maybe it has something to do with all the jerks I've once insisted to call "my boyfriend" or maybe it's just the fact that my heart beats so fast every time you hold my hand. Or maybe it is the way you are or shall I say, maybe it's who you are. You are so great and you make me feel in love and think "alright, please, don't leave me". I'm scared that you'll leave me, cause you wanna know a secret? I LOVE YOU, and I'm not just saying this because people expect you to automatically love your boyfriend/girlfriend, I'm saying this because I mean it. I mean it with every heartbeat and breath I take. I LOVE YOU.

So, thank you for being mine. Thank you for letting me love you and please, don't go away.

Si je donne mon cœur à vou

"If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me understand
'cause I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just holding hands [...]

[...] So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you."

The Beatles - If I fell

Definitly one of their best songs in my opinion or maybe it's just the fact that I'm a dork and oh, well... you know!

If I trust in you, oh please, don't run and hide

I'm feeling so... I can't even find words to describe how I'm feeling right now. I'm happy and I feel all bubbly even though I got a fever and a stupid headache that kinda stops me from thinking and makes me forget about what I was going to write.

What can I say? Oh boy, you give me butterflies. They keep waving with their wings and it gives me the most confortable and happy feeling someone can ever get. It makes me feel like I wanna go somewhere that we can be alone by ourselves, where I can show you how much I care for you and how much I like you. Cause man, I really like you and I like everything about you. Every single thing about you. I like the way you talk, walk. The way you touch my skin and kiss my lips. The way you laugh at me and even the way you are when you're being a little evil. I like the way you hold my hand and make me warm and I really adore the feeling I get everytime I'm near you and I realized today that I don't need much from you, I just need to hear your voice to know that everything's fine and that I'm damn sure that you're the greatest thing that could've happened to me right now.

Am I close now?

I don't know what it's worth but I'm still here

The girl with kaleidoscope eyes

I think I'm ready now!

“A girl should be two things: classy and FABULOUS!” – Coco Chanel

Sick, sick, sick

I can totally say that I've never been this sick before. Not that I can recall anyway.
My throat is killing me, I have the worst headache ever, high fever that makes me sweat as I was living in hell. I'm hungry and thirsty but I can't swallow anything. It gets stuck in my throat. Maybe I should go and see a doctor and something, hope my mum will be home soon so I can go and see a doctor.

Anyway, I've spent the whole day listening to Bloc Party. Now I'm gonna watch Across the universe, i think...

brb, movie + starvingday

Karma is a bitch

I realized that karma is a bitch. Yesterday I was laughing at a friend because he got the swineflu and couldn't go out this weekend and guess what happened to me this morning? I woke up with the biggest pain in my throat and the worst headache ever. Not to mention my stupid fever... Karma is a fucking bitch.

Even though I'm sick, I'm going to Stockholm today because I miss a very special boy.
He's the cuttest boy in the whole planet and haha, Geez, this is soooo gay.

Replay it

Think again. Dream Again.
I keep playing things on my head and they never go away. Never.
If I close my eyes I see it, if I open them I see it. It doesn't matter, some stuffs never leave.
Forgive and forget. Forget and forgive. I choose forgive and replay.

H.

I guess that what I've been trying to say lately is that I think I'm falling in love with you and I'm scared.

Life's no storybook

I love Bright Eyes.
I love how Conor's always so right about everything.

Not cool.

And it's a big world and it's not fair to me

Ignoring the fact that I lost my bus/subway pass, that my arm is hurting as hell and that I just burnt my tongue with some lingon and raspberry with cream tea, I'm still happy and bubbly cause I just got two albums by Conor Oberst!

I miss London